Brooke Layout

July 28, 2012

Of rings and things

The summer Olympic games have officially started and so has my snarky commentary. I have many thoughts about the opening ceremonies, so I'll do my best to keep my opinions short-ish.

1) First off, let's just say that the meadow was beautiful. That pastoral scene with the giant tree was breathtaking. Two thumbs up to the set designer on that one.

2) Why in the world were there a bazillion people wandering around? No matter what part of the show we were at, there were large crowds of people everywhere. WHY? Personally I would have preferred a less cluttered English countryside, but maybe that's what the English countryside looked like and I'm just an ig'nant 'Merican. It's happened before.

3) Do they not have any sense of urgency? I mean, it's Friday night. Most people aren't rushing off to emergency meetings, but that doesn't mean I want to spend 30 minutes watching English peasants drag around AstroTurf. Let's get some hitch in that giddy up. I would have been much more impressed if things would have moved along at a quicker pace.

4) What was with that freaky nightmare scene? Those crawling monkey creatures with the neon eyes??? Really??? Does that foster the Olympic spirit? Cause it almost fostered the pee out of me.

5) I did really like the part where the glow in the dark butterflies rode around on bicycles. Those were pretty. I could have watched a 30 minute performance of some synchronized butterflyin'. That would have been something to marvel at. And then the E.T. butterfly bicycle? COOL.

6) Thank goodness the athletes know how to move. That parade of nations was quick! Well done international athletes, well done.

7) Let's all be thankful that I do not have supernatural powers, because if I did I would have reached through the TV and strangled the NBC commentators. In the words of J-dubs "LET IT BREATHE". Do you really have to talk con-stant-ly? Can you not just be quiet for two seconds and let us enjoy the spectacle of the giant baby? Just. Shut. Up. (This goes for the sporting events I've seen so far as well. The theme of jabbering seems to be what NBC is sticking with)

8) Seriously, giant baby? Wtf.

9) The torch was pretty cool. Each angelic little English kid carrying those copper petals and then putting them all together to form the torch was my favorite part. I really enjoyed the camera shot from inside the torch looking up at each individual tube/petal. The torch guy should get a high five today.

10) Lastly, the "independent Olympic athletes" by far stole the show. Those three kids were having the time of their lives. I wanted to watch an entire 4 hour parade of them! I have no idea who they are or what sport they compete in, but I would guess that their pastimes include being awesome, killer dance moves, and not giving a rat's patootie about behaving while on national television. I want to be friends with them. I want to invite them over for drinks. And nachos. I bet they love nachos.

Ok, this blog post is almost as long as the opening ceremonies. Time to end it. In conclusion I'd like to say "USA! USA! USA!".


Adrienne Gilbreath said...

I didn't get the whole giant baby thing either. REALLY didn't get it. We DVR'd it so we could skip the boring parts. There were a lot of parts skipped with this OC. I really started to miss the communist hoopla from four years ago.

idyll hands said...

You know, I kind of liked the monkeys. But I like scary. England is scary, you know.